A professor asked the class to write a couple paragraphs about ourselves including where we were born, why we are taking this course, our major, hobbies, and other interesting facts. I am an asshole – I can admit that – but one adjective or a sentence would not suffice. So, naturally I was forced to proceed with a paragraph. I do not have a bio or an about me section on this website, so I figured why not utilize this…this shit. 

Hello. I was born in the United States and I am fluent in Klingon. I am taking this course primarily to satisfy my elective requirements as well as having a general interest in philosophy. I am a psychology major. I enjoy adventurous activities such as experimenting with new Rooibos Tea blends. My adventures extend to playing blindfolded chess, and drinking the rain. (I am proud to say that I have managed to catch approximately a 1/16 cup of rain in my mouth.) Furthermore, I enjoy a good game of Balderdash while indulging in tea biscuits and strawberry water that I create with my water infuser. 

I am also an esteemed alumni member of the Advanced Dungeon and Dragons Unisex League which is part of an institution that uses Klingon as the official language.
I do not like small children, nor do I like small animals other than animals belonging to the family of the Sciurdae. Oh, and I must note I am partial to chipmunks. Squirrels are rather rude and obnoxious at times.